A twist to be

Franck might be going back to France, forever.

We are now facing a twist that will change our life, big one. I received his call this evening on the way back home. he told me that he is haveing a problem in applying his employment pass in Singapore. "How come?" I was surprised. But that was true; he got rejected from Singapore Administration for getting a temporary employment pass; now he cannot make it to be on board next monday. I don't know if he failed to get the temporary one, he still can get the permanent one.

It will be so unfair to him, or to us; he has gone this far to get in Singapore. I refuse to imagine him going back to France, and everything will be staring over again. I am so sorry about the fight I initiated the day before. It was horrible, and destructive. Now I realize it might sweep every effort we had builed so far, and I don't know once he goes back, can we still be so lucky like this?

After hung up on Franckie, the only thought I had was regreting. Why have I done? I swore on the day Frackie left me two years ago that I am willing to sacrifice everything to be with him. But look at me, I have become a monster who is never satisfed. I have obeyed my oath. I promised that I will wait for him for nine years, now it is just one third of it.

Now I will cross my fingers and pray, I will keep on being patient and waitng for him no matter what happens in the next few weeks. And I will not bring him any more pressure from now on and manage to make him happy if he gets chance to stay. God help me, I don't wanna give up.